Tips & Advice For First Time Chastity Subs - Best Devices, Hygiene & Key Holding Services
There are lots of reasons a man might decide to enter into chastity, many do it as full relinquishment of control and the ultimate sacrifice to their Mistress, to feel that they are still serving their Mistress at a distance, to torture oneself for lack of a Mistress, to challenge oneself or learn some self control, and even as a cure for masturbation addiction!
Whatever your reasons there are a few things to take into consideration before deciding to go into short term or long term chastity, and while there are a few forums out there most of the info is fragmented and it's easy to miss out on vital bits.
I have held many subs in chastity, both male and female, over the last 16 years and being fully involved in the journey with them I have picked up a few useful bits of information about being in chastity along the way, so I have put together some essential info on getting into it and everything you need to consider from health & hygiene, finding the best fitting device, maintenance, and engaging in a key holding service with me.
So before deciding to commit to chastity there are a few key points to take into consideration.
*In terms of health, studies have shown that regular ejaculation can decrease the risk of developing prostate cancer, so it is important to have a bit of knowledge about your family medical history, if prostate cancer has a history in your family then chastity without release for no more than a couple of weeks at a time would probably be sensible, and not for extended periods either. The health risks need to be remembered when deciding about the amount of time/frequency of release you want to achieve in chastity.
*Whilst it is easy to urinate and wash when wearing a chastity device, it is likely that you will experience some rubbing and chafing of the device on your testicles or penis, this discomfort can be relieved with the regular application of water based lube, morning afternoon and night, so you should factor this possibility into your daily schedule and make preparations for carrying lube on you at all times.
*Finding the right chastity device for you could be a costly initial investment, no cocks are the same and there is no one size fits all, so while many men in chastity may recommend a particular product for fit and comfort it may not always be suitable for you. As chastity devices are quite "intimate" items not all companies will accept returns, so you may end up wasting a bit of money on a couple of useless devices before you find the right fit.
*Whilst it may seem more psychologically exciting to wear a heavy steel device and feel totally under control, there are some practical implications to consider. A heavy bulky device is going to make itself known, to you and potentially to the outside world. Imagine your life wearing this device before you go for it , you wear really tight pants at the office, you clunk it on the corner of your desk, you man spread your legs while on public transport, you wear very baggy shorts a lot, consider the areas where such a large heavy device might get you into trouble, especially if your keys are going to be held by a third party! You've also got to try and get some sleep with that thing hanging there! You may eventually decide to consider investing in different devices for different occasions.
*Make provisions for emergencies! If you're in long distance chastity to someone and the keys to your device are 100 miles away, what happens if you start to feel unwell and need to call an ambulance? Are you trying to hide this device from someone in the family? Would you be mortified if the paramedics saw it? If you are not in close regular contact with your key holder you need to make sure you have a way out of your device in an emergency, even if that means stashing bolt cutters in the house somewhere. You shouldn't use them unless you absolutely have to obviously! Don't break the trust in your chastity contract (assuming that's you're arrangement) by pulling a cheeky one!
*If even with a fairly small device you are concerned that it is still showing, you might have to consider "tucking" your junk between your legs slightly. You could do this with a piece of duct tape, attached to the underside of the device passing between your legs towards the back and stuck down to a bum cheek, not the most comfortable for long term daily wear, especially if you've got a hairy ass! Otherwise you are going to need some tight fitting underwear to hold the device close to your body. A lot of chastity subs enjoy the added element of being further emasculated by being made to wear ladies underwear, a nice tight thong will definitely hold your junk in place! If ladies underwear is not doing it for you or too much of a risk, then consider buying a mans thong or some speedo type pants instead.
How to choose the best device.
You're going to need to get really up close and personal with your junk for this one, you're going to have to push yourself to make 'observations' about size and shape without being critical or fantastical about it! If you judge yourself too harshly or are too generous with your observations, then you're going to end up forking out money for devices you can't use, so for once in your life you will need to be objective about your genitals!
Are you a shower or a grower? Measure your penis length and circumference, you will still get erections while you wear the device, wake up with morning glory etc. you will just be restricted, squished and uncomfortable, so make a note of the difference in size between hard and flaccid and look for a shaft piece that allows for that. Inspect your testicles, is your scrotum easy to hold in the palm of your hand or are the testicles tucked up too high? Perhaps they hang really low and you have a very stretched scrotum. Perhaps you have huge swollen or chunky balls that you need two hands to wrap around the whole lot properly, any one or all of these size and shape factors could affect if a device will be comfortable or not, so make sure you know what you are working with. If you have large chunky balls that make a bulge in your pants already then it's not a good idea to get the largest chunkiest cage to sit on top of them, you're just asking for trouble.
After that you need to understand how most devices fit together so you can better understand the space the device provides once assembled.
Although there is a large variety of device designs out there the most common structure found is this:
This device is known as a "ball trapper" and consists of 3 main elements, the shaft cover at the front, the ring at the back which surrounds your full genitals, penis and testicles, and the spacing pins which are inserted from the back of the ring passing across the top of the penis and then extending through the shaft cover at the front, where a hole in the center spacing pin allows for a padlock which prevents the further 2 side pins from sliding out of the shaft piece.
These spacing pins come in different lengths to allow a larger or smaller gap at the bottom between the ring and shaft for the testicles to comfortably hang out between, hence the name "ball trapper!"
These devices come in 3 different materials, solid stainless steel and coloured or transparent plastic and silicone. From my experience I would say that each material has it's benefits but within a given set of circumstances. Steel devices although often beautiful and intricate, do not offer a lot of practicality for long term all day wear, those with less than average stature can get away with wearing these long term, but anyone with a bit of bulk in the length or balls is going to find heavy steel tiresome in the long run. They can be lovely show pieces though and a lot of subs buy one for "special occasions", a session with Mistress or a public event for example.
A lot of people are very happy in long term chastity with a plastic device, though they are very rigid, can cause excess sweat in the region, rub and chafe certain areas of the shaft or pinch on the balls if the ring is quite thin.
If you are considering a really long term in chastity then I would definitely recommend a soft touch skin feel silicone device. The velvety feel will cause less friction on your skin, they are light weight so wont pull down on your genitals, create a massive bulk in your pants or clunk on the corners of furniture as you squeeze past, and the flexibility of the silicone gives you a lot more in terms of comfort when it comes to sleeping with the device on or sitting in awkward positions, driving for a long time etc.
Many of the silicone devices come with extra thick rings that surround the whole genitals, I have found that these thicker rings worked really well for gentleman with low hanging testicles and extended scrotums as they could not slip out of these rings as they could on the plastic and steel devices. This particlar model (black device below) is the Master Series sado cage which my personal sub currently wears, he has tried many devices and found this to be the most comfortable and accommodating of his long scrotum.
When it comes to sizes, if you have an average sized penis and balls with no striking features then a lot of the standard devices will fit you, finding full compatibility will come down to the material used, the type of system/ mechanism, the locking options.
If you have a thick penis and/or very chunky balls in a tight high up scrotum then you're going to struggle with the ring sizes on most standard devices, even if you can just about squeeze your cock and balls into the largest ring provided it's not a good fit if it cant turn loosely around the balls allowing enough freedom for some movement, retraction, circulation and thermal regulation. If you hope to make babies one day, restricting circulation to your testicles on the regular is never a good idea. If you have very large testicles then you are going to struggle to find anything among the standard products with a ring large enough and will probably be looking at having a custom piece made.
If you have a very thick penis or an excessive amount /overstretched foreskin, it is likely that the shaft covering piece of the device will rub and chafe on specific points and cause swollen welted areas of skin. (This can heal easily after the device is removed, if the area is kept clean and free of infection while the device is on, it's just going to be very uncomfortable.) You need to be looking for devices with a wider shaft to be able to tuck your skin in properly and longer spacer pins to allow extra room for a larger thicker cock or balls getting in the way. You definitely should not be looking at any devices without spacer pins.
If you have very low hanging testicles and a stretched out scrotum, you may find that even wearing the smallest ring possible your testicles still slip out of the ring when you're showering or swimming. The extra thick rings that come on devices like the Master Series are going to be the best bet for wrangling those dangling balls.
It is important to note that if while wearing a chastity device you begin to suffer from stomach cramps and pains, urinary tract issues (needing to pee but not being able to do it, burning while you pee) or a burning or aching sensation in the testicles, this is a good indication that you're testicles are being strangled and the tight fit is interfering with your normal bodily functions, you need to switch to a larger cock ring as soon as possible. With a good fitting ring you should still be able to get your middle finger under it while it's on and locked in place.
If you have very retracted testicles that prevent you from wrapping your hand around your scrotum properly, it is unlikely that you will manage to fit a chastity cage at all, in which case you could consider the waist belted device, there are also specialist devices for micro-penises that don't reach into the shaft piece.
If you are one of the few fellas that have been bestowed with gloriously chunky balls and members that could easily be described as above average, then you will probably find that most of what's out there is too tight and uncomfortable, but the good news is that for about the same price as what you would invest on a good quality device in the standard market, you can have a custom sized device designed and 3D printed for you by a designer on Shapeways. Although the devices are printed in plastic and not silicone as I would normally recommend for long term wear, the fact that you can have the device specifically made to your measurements means you get the perfect custom comfort fit, and there have been a lot of great reviews for this product.
These custom devices are known as KHD (KH Dreams) chastity devices and are designed by the Italian pedro69 (who better than an Italian to understand the difficulties of being stallion sized!) on the 3D printing site shapeways, the direct link to his store is here: https://www.shapeways.com/shops/pedro69
I particularly like the more ergonomic shape of the ring which I am sure will give the testicles more a feeling of being hugged than pinched.
Device Locking Methods.
All devices that I know of can be secured with a steel padlock and key set up, though if you are in chastity to a Mistress that lives a hundred miles away this is not exactly convenient for dropping of the keys or picking them up if you need to.
As shown in the silicone devices above, it is possible instead to use small plastic locks that have their own individual ID number, although the locks are very easily removable they are only usable once, once the ID lock is in place you must register the ID number with your Mistress and if you attempt to remove it without her knowledge you will not be able to re-attach the same lock She has registered so you will be caught out by the unregistered ID number of a new lock. Some Mistresses will ask for daily verification via, photos, videos or daily passwords to ensure that your lock ID number remains the same.
If you do decide to go for a proper steel lock, consider that the lock will have sharp edges and corners, many subs have complained about the corner of locks digging into something or even tearing the skin slightly, so if you want to go for a proper padlock, make sure you look for a rubber coated lock that will also have curves instead of sharp edges.
While it's not impossible to keep clean in a chastity device your cleansing routine is going to have to adapt somewhat.
The first thing you need to think about before you even put on the device is your pubic hair. Long pubic hair is going to get trapped in the device and tug and pull, and it may not necessarily happen at the most convenient moment! Constant tugging of your pubes is not going to make it a pleasant experience. On the other side of the coin, you do not want to be fully shaving your pubes off either, regrowth can be very very itchy, you're not going to be able to scratch the areas that are being covered by the device and any sweating under the device or the device itself rubbing the shaved area can cause irritation and lead to folliculitis. (A bacterial infection of the hair follicle which can cause ingrown hair, boils & scarring.)
Before putting the device on it's a sensible idea to just have a good trim, using a beard trimmer with a plastic guard and trimming it down to about a centimetre in length. When ever you have a release date where the device comes off, you need to use that opportunity to have a re-trim and a bloody good wash!
Once you have the device on the next thing to take into account is urination, most subs will tell you that having a snug fitting shaft piece is best, the tip of your penis needs to be nestled nicely against the tip of the shaft cover so that when you urinate the stream comes straight out of the tip of the device. If there is any space between the head of your penis and the shaft cover it is likely to fill with urine every time you pee, meaning you're going to have to give your penis a good rinse every time you visit the bathroom.
When you wash you are going need to need a shower head with good water pressure, directed into the tip of the shaft to make sure you get a good rinse around your foreskin, it is a good idea to use a little moisturising body wash to keep your skin in good condition. After you have washed you are going to want to get in there with some cotton tips and ensure you have dried off properly under the device, your penis needs to be kept quite dry as trapped moisture can lead to gathering of bacteria and nasty smells, particularly under the foreskin, so having a little sniff of the used cotton tip will give you a good indication of how well you are doing with the hygiene. Your genitals will need to be washed properly in this manner at least twice a day, morning and night.
Although you need to keep your penis dry you will need to keep it moisturised to help with chafing, especially at night when your sleeping. Water based lubes can be great as they can provide moisturisation without staying wet for too long and at night a good slathering of baby oil all over your cock and balls can prevent pinching and rubbing while you sleep. Whatever product you choose you need to ensure that it does not contain Glycerin, as this ingredient is a sugary compound and can lead to yeast infections and sticky smelly messes.
When you are in chastity it is good practice to keep a little hygiene kit with you at all times, you never know when urination might just get a bit messy or you notice a bad smell and just need a quick wash, or it's just rubbing you up the wrong way and needs an application of lube. If you do need to give your penis a good rinse while you are out and about, say in the office toilets or a public loo for example, you are going to need a water container that you can take into the cubicle with you, and something that has good water pressure to make sure you rinse properly. A lot of subs recommend a hair dye application bottle, this kind of bottle has a pointed slender nozzle, the pointed nozzle can fit in the holes and gaps of the shaft piece and you can give the bottle a good squeeze and get a nice strong jet of water out of the nozzle straight along the shaft of your penis and in the tip for your foreskin so it's a good idea to purchase one of these, and you can add a little moisturising body wash to the solution too.
Your essential hygiene kit that you keep with you at all times should include: A water application bottle as described above.
A small bottle of moisturising body wash.
A packet of cotton tips.
A small hand towel or wash cloth (you need to be able to dry your penis properly & toilet paper will just stick to everything!)
A small bottle of water based lube.
A small bottle of baby oil.
If you still struggle with keeping your genitals in a sanitary condition and are noticing frequent bad smells, than you should discuss with your key holder the possibility of regular supervised release in order to give the area a proper wash without obstruction.
Key Holding Services.
If you are hoping to be in chastity in service to a Dominant or simply need someone to hold the keys and keep you in check, you are going to need a key holder.
If you serve a Mistress privately can you suggest your desire for chastity and have the terms written into your submission agreement. If you serve a professional Mistress she may agree to hold your keys as part of a regular arrangement you already hold with her, otherwise if you are not regularly in service to any particular Mistress you could apply for a key holding service even if you are not interested in attending sessions.
The terms of key holding will vary from Mistress to Mistress, My terms for the key holding service I provide are as follows.
I require that you purchase your own chastity device and locks, as discussed in this article the device is a very personal item and only you can best choose what is comfortable for your term of chastity.
The key holding service I offer does not include a face to face meeting, that would have to booked as a standard session under the usual rate in addition to the key holding fee, so this would be necessary if you prefer to have a steel padlock and have me actually keep the keys until you can come and see me for some fun release.
Otherwise the key holding fees are £30 a week or £50 a month, this would give you direct contact with me through My chastity group on the Telegram app so that I can keep tabs on your chastity including a video chat for your release date if you were unable to book an additional face to face session, and I would occasionally send you some pics and clips to torment you with! You will be joining the group along with anyone else that may also be in a chastity contract with me, this way I can keep tabs on you all in the same place, send you all the same content at the same time and so on. I will not manage chastity subs individually outside of the group, this is too complicated and time consuming for me to manage with all My other work commitments.
Unlike Whatsapp the Telegram app has enhanced privacy features, which allow you to alter your settings so that nobody who isn't in your contacts list can see your number. You are able to set up multiple profiles with the same number on Telegram, so you can have your normal profile with your real name for all the normal life contacts you have in your phone, family, friends etc. Then you can set up a second profile with an anonymous username and then go through your contact list to block all your family and friends from seeing this profile and use that to join the group. These settings allow you total anonymity as a member of My chastity group, but be sure you have these settings fully configured before I add you to the group.
The rate must be paid upfront at the beginning of the week/month and I expect you to remain in chastity for the whole week/month, if you do release yourself from chastity without permission for whatever reason, you will be expected to make another payment of £30/£50 to restart the week/month of key holding service and a £100 fine or all Telegram contact with me will end and you will be removed from the group, the remaining days of the previous week/month you paid for, will not be refunded. If you are late with your payment and I have not received it on the agreed day, you will incur a late payment fee of £50 per day for a maximum of 3 days, after which I will end your contract and remove you from the group. If you wish to restart the contract the £150 late payment fee and new keyholding fee will still be required. While in your chastity contract you can be granted temporary reprieve by "buying" an orgasm at the cost of £200. I insist on watching said orgasm occur by video call so I can ensure you have only one before re-locking your device. If you cannot do a video call I will accept a privately shot video, but it must be a seamless, uncut, one shot video of you cumming and re-locking, if it isn't you will be fined £100.
if you are unable to book additional face to face sessions, then rather than a steel padlock you would use the plastic locks that have individual ID numbers, I will keep a record of the ID number and if I see that it has changed without my permission, as well as your new payment to restart the key holding service, I will also delay the date of your release and depending on the reason for your device removal I may issue you with a punishment task too.
I will do random verification spot checks throughout the week to ensure you have not removed the device, by sending you a new password, you must write this password and the days date on a piece of paper and hold that paper as you take a photo of yourself wearing the device with the ID number I have on record clearly visible.
You are required to purchase your own chastity device if you do not already have one, as well a pack of the plastic locks with ID numbers., which are available cheaply in bulk on amazon.
If you have a device with a built in lock, you will need to purchase instead something called "a kitchen safe box" which is a plastic tub with an automatic locking lid that is set with a timer and your verification will involve providing photos of your undamaged, still locked box showing the remaining time left on the timer. If you enter a month long chastity contract, you will lock this box one week at a time, to allow you to access your keys and remove your device for your weekly hygiene and maintenance task.
If you are considering exploring chastity and giving full control of your pleasure and orgasms to a special lady in your life, hopefully some of this information can help you make an informed choice, though it is always a good idea to put yourself through a self imposed period of chastity to get used to it first before you go handing those keys over!
If you have other tips and experiences to share or particular products to recommend I am sure my chastity subs and followers would love to hear from you, so please feel free to leave your comments below.
The more information we can gather on the subject, the more men we can convince to live in chastity and finally the Female Order will start to take full control!!!! :D
Happy long term denial and sacrifice,
Domina Jemma x :)